A new motorhome has materialised. Heard about a neighbour selling it on Tuesday by yesterday it was paid for, a bargain and a half, and I’m still adjusting to the new vistas opening. The opportunity to be still in wild beautiful places beside lakes, a fire at night, stillness and silence. It’s where I’m increasingly heading right into the void of the infinite and the invisible.
Allotment -I’m spending hours there nurturing my inner orientation and my inner animal side planting, growing getting my hands dirty and creating beauty. And a lot of just being. And friends drop by too. I have have solo bbqs. It’s a joy. I can sit for 4 hours with a little pottering around alone. Communing with silence, befriending the void of the infinite and invisible. I’m pleased with the progress in just 4 months and excited how it might develop though I have no vision of how that may look.
Friend – my old beloved friend Michael has reappeared. Been together most days and he is throwing himself into activity in the van and the allotment. I am grateful for the companionship and the help.
I love to see him so happy and engaged. And I’m happy in his company. And also mindful that historically it all ends suddenly in a fit of rage and he is off again for months. I’m savouring our togetherness and new cooperation while he is still here. I love him deeply, some aspects of which are comprehensible consciously – others aspects have some deep inexplicable mystery. Could be just simple compatibility and the attraction of that. It’s something, it always has been. I’ve examined all the psyche issues and have concluded it’s well beyond the subconscious conditioned reflexes which initially attracted me.
Spirit – with commitment increased I’m noticing more joy and peace. My new enlightened teacher mentor Marc Leavitt, continues to hand hold me into the void and the silence and reassures that scared part of me.
My progress gauge is how much I get irritated with life and people, and I’m pleased to notice it’s been seldom the last few weeks. I barely notice neighbour noises now and don’t turn on music to drown the noises out. I face what is happening. Less reactive. This is everything to me in life, my main purpose and goal.
Business – well some changes afoot here. A second team about to be employed, new van and equipment and more work for me but less financial stress. It’s a payoff of stresses. More turnover less scarcity, more men, less dependency on the one too large crew who go over time on every job. I love them all but I’m running a business too. they need split up and separated into smaller more efficient teams. Still looking like a construction site this one.
Solitude – And there’s solo submersion win nature with the dog in the marvellous 300 acre park full of trees, ponds, a big river with waterfalls, abundant wildflowers and wildlife. What a privilege. Inner silence is my only refuge.
So yes it all sounds perfect and it is. Life bestowing grace. Gratitude guiding, remembering to breath into the present, short moments of remembering that many times a day. And I can just allow it, and enjoy witnesses what is unfolding and follow the next foot where the ground presents itself.