Three potential conflict incomings yesterday were like little stones plopping into my quiet still pond, creating perturbations emotionally. 1. A … More
Tag: stress
Thank you Project
I’m compiling a list of companies and service providers and individuals who I’m going to write to and thank. Things … More
Contraction and Surrender
Tightness in the chest. Anxiety. I see you, I accept you, I allow you, hello. I breathe. Here I am, … More
Handshake with Feelings
Miraculously I did find a place of peace inside yesterday. I thought I was going to melt with all that … More
Tension Building
Out the door at 7am with the dog for a short walk. Awake at 4Am. Today too anxious to be … More
Gnarly Knots
8am. I’m amazed at the perfect choreography of it all, how well designed it is for my individual resistances. In … More
Keeping it Together, just
In the shower I run my hands down over the body and say hello to my tummy, hello to the … More
Sent the price
I sent the price. Three choices, £97k, £84k or £75k. Not small amounts obviously and none of which will make … More
Lowness
Been curious about this mood of malaise that has been here over the last days and week in particular. I … More
Facing it All
“Thank you for being here, it’s good to have your company”, I say to Elsa when she comes over for … More
Still in Worry
This is what the iChing said to me earlier Transcending the entire situation = turning away to attend to higher … More
Sunk Mood at the Start
Then a bit of changing the channel inside helped shift me out of it. Woke feeling an anxiety that has … More
A dream and meaning
Thoughts on the dream below. I watched a couple of videos last night of people who’d had near death experiences … More
Too much Happening
Strong dreams again which I think are actually lucid since I know I’m in one and can decide what to … More
Rainy Monday
Grey and very wet morning and I’ve been cheering myself up by singing as I get dressed and make tea, … More
Facing Reactivity
Bang bang bang…all that surrendering to love then back ‘in it’. Triggered on several fronts. Hello again reactivity. It rained … More
Imagination and Suffering
A visitation from emotional pain. Goodness gracious, what a level of suffering I went into yesterday. Succumbed to worries about … More
You are Loved, You are cherished, I’m here for You
Another long sleep and bobbing in and out of sleep from the early hours. And again I went through the … More
Hello again Sadness and Anxiety
How unpredictable life can be ! We never know what life will present us with, or where the next challenge … More
Fearlessness Training
The kickback comes as a training exercise. Fearlessness is bathed in and then, anything fearful inside arises. The mere hint … More
Angst
Back ‘in it’ again. Not exactly a ‘dark night of the soul’ level but anxious a lot. I wasn’t able … More
Undoings
Feeling low this morning. Yesterday I had a magnificent woodland walk, lunch at the park cafe….and saw the men on … More
Half Full/Half Empty
The half full perspective. It’s a beautiful sunny morning here. The men all have work and a job lined up … More
Fun and Sharing day
Been loving the depth of sharing from my son T. Some of it quite hard for a mother to listen … More
Shadow work by Dream
Dreamt I was back in an office after 3 or 4 days off. I was asked by some colleagues if … More
Worry Thoughts
The more I practice dropping into the feelings in the body, the more pain I uncover. There’s a whole lineup … More
Facing the Disturbing Stuff
Thought it’s about time I just allow the noises from upstairs to take place without putting music on every time … More
Resistance and Suffering
Today a big rain arrived after weeks of dryness. It added exciting new sensory elements to walking up the river. … More
Processing about of Self Judging
Here sitting at the kitchen table right now, where real life happens through the senses in this present as it … More
Into and Through Suffering
Yesterday turned out to be unexpectedly social. I was glad for the company on what was an odd, out of … More
Jumpy This Morning
Thursday. There’s a lot of this happening during this opening/awakening situation I’m in, disturbances and sufferings are way more noticeable … More
And Back to Peace again
Relative peace anyway. My ego is on alert now it knows I’m onto it! I am on this intensive personal … More
An Awake Day
A whole day nearly of being wide open and wide awake. The thought, ‘this is what enlightenment feels like’ arrived … More
Collapsing the Stickman
When I allow thoughts to arrive unnoticed, my mind can build them into little stories in my head that I … More
An Unravelling
Had a big fat one this week. Inside expansion and unravelling of illusions being reflected outside. The obstacles are coming … More
Numb
I experienced a long sobbing session yesterday. The tears then came and went through the day. Partly also a release … More
A Tightening
I have been tightening up and up and up, and it’s damn painful. A whole set of triggering factors ricocheting … More
Took a Risk
Quite a big one for me with my conditioning to please others. Risking another’s wrath. And experiencing the fall out … More
Emotion from the Past
I went for one walk with Michael, a beautiful open sharing interaction and he even apologised for the anger outbursts/ending … More
Trusting Yourself
Quite often a strong inner prompting suggests a course of action that is contrary to the one we have made … More
How I stopped biting my Nails after 52 years
In my baby book it was written when my age was just 2, “she bites her nails”. And I have … More
Clearing Clutter helps!
I’ve had a paperwork pile which has been growing in front of my eyes here on the table since May. … More
Maintenance Diet
Sometimes life is like being in the birthing room having a long painless labour. A time of waiting patiently. While … More
Well and Happy!
After so many many months of daily managing of anxiety, it has subsided for the last few weeks. And wow … More
No Alcohol Experiment – Day 9
As I mentioned in my last post, I’m experimenting with cutting out alcohol for a while to see what happens … More
Bit of a diary entry this one
Don’t expect anyone to read it as it’s long and a splurging out of troubles. Just need to express how … More
When it’s Tough in Here
It’s really windy and pouring and it’s going to be an all-day-er. I notice that when anxiety is present, combined … More
New territory, Dread and Courage
I did my first counselling session with a real client last week! It came naturally and went smoothly. I was … More
On Mindfulness, the dangers…
I’ve observed at a drop in mindfulness group I used to go to that some severely anxious people who came … More
Listening to Feelings
I am gradually designing my life to be full of what I love to do and what makes me happy, … More
Business Overwhelm Today
Giving myself permission to have a long moany analyses of what I like and dont like about running a business. … More
Wonder Woman Club Review
I spent the afternoon at a woman’s business club meeting, the Wonder Woman Club. How I enjoyed myself there meeting … More
Snakes and Ladders!
Another meltdown! So many things going wrong right now in business. Its like a game of snakes and ladders. Mostly … More
Help is Available
I have two life coaches at the moment, a therapist and an occasional mindfulness coach. What has happened over the … More
So I sacked the Guy
The build up to this for me was so very stressful. I really dislike hurting people. But as the custodian … More
Saturday anxiety flavours
In bed of course, the weekly treat to loll around with no need to do anything or go anywhere. My … More
Horrible
So I went to see a client, saw how badly my man had finished her job, she didn’t pay me … More
In Anxiety I’m Scared of Everything
I wanted to mention this because I don’t think I did while in the state I was in last week. … More
Awoke feeling stress
How is that bloody possible after 2 chilled days and a great sleep?! not sure why at all. Woke up … More
Being Honest about Fear
I am so tempted to just come right out with the anxiety I experience in public, on social media such … More
Learning to Rest with it All 