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Learning to Rest with it All

“Let go of what has passed. Let go of what may come. Let go of what is happening now. Don’t try to figure anything out. Don’t try to make anything happen. Relax, right now, and rest” Tilopa

Tag: childhood damage

Hello again Anxiety

Awoke with disturbed feelings amid a vivid dream about C. The theme was me trying to get love and him … More

anxiety, childhood damage, fear, guilt, letting go, self compassion, self soothing, shame, suffering, thoughts, worry

Restoration of Love

Ooo well that little foray yesterday ended with me in quite a lot of tears as I described my experience … More

childhood damage, letting go, self care, self compassion, surrender experiment

I love, I respect and I like Myself

Breakfast in the park and walk with a friend in the morning, then a deeply restful afternoon yesterday. After that … More

Appreciation, being present, building resilience, childhood damage, feeling safe, flourishing, gratitude, inner peace, letting go, Michael Singer, mindfulness, peace, Recovery, refuge, self care, self compassion, self love, self soothing, success, surrender experiment, trusting life

Shadow Work

Day started with one friend inviting me for breakfast at the local bar/restaurant. I didn’t enjoy it. There was a … More

building resilience, childhood damage, guilt, letting go, resistance, shame, suffering, surrender experiment

Shame

Trigger warning – this post about shame may be triggering for some to read, so please tread with caution. I … More

anxiety, childhood damage, dread, fear, feeling safe, guilt, habits, pain, shame, suffering, worry

What a Great Day

Long intense detailed dream of me and another one or two friends actually inside this AI art program. Instead of … More

beauty of nature, being present, building resilience, childhood damage, curiosity, fear, feeling safe, flourishing, gratitude, letting go, living abundantly, self soothing, surrender experiment, trusting life, unity

Undoings

Feeling low this morning. Yesterday I had a magnificent woodland walk, lunch at the park cafe….and saw the men on … More

childhood damage, fear, letting go, stress, suffering, worry

Therapy Session

Light rain bringing such wonderful smells. It was lovely to walk in the fields and woods in the rain yesterday, … More

anger, childhood damage, compassion, Recovery, self care, suffering

Relationship with Mum

I will maybe explore this over a few days as it will be too long. First I’ll lay out the … More

childhood damage, family relationships on the spiritual path, old friends and family, painful times, resistance

Surfacing Core Wounds

I had a long site visit yesterday and extensive chats with the client, the men and tree surgeons about having … More

anxiety, childhood damage, fear of success, memories, painful times, resistance, self love, upper limit problem

Privileged Abandonment

I was on a course all day yesterday about the damage done to children who are sent to boarding school. … More

attachment, childhood damage, Recovery, self care, separation, success

Facing the Disturbing Stuff

Thought it’s about time I just allow the noises from upstairs to take place without putting music on every time … More

anxiety, beauty of nature, childhood damage, disturbing feelings, irritation, letting go, mindfulness, misophonia, nature walks, resistance, stress, surrender experiment

Dip of a Morning

Not sure why. It was a stressful day yesterday with more minor bad news from another project – easy to … More

childhood damage, letting go, trusting life

Friends (Long One)

I suppose we need these times of feeling unhappily squeezed to face some things, we wouldn’t face them if we … More

childhood damage, feeling safe, letting go, old friends and family

Processing about of Self Judging

Here sitting at the kitchen table right now, where real life happens through the senses in this present as it … More

childhood damage, guilt, old friends and family, shame, stress, suffering, worry

Transcendental Smell

There’s a certain smell that arises in the morning air after a long rain, when the moisture and temperature conditions … More

Appreciation, building resilience, childhood damage, compassion, feeling safe, flourishing, freedom, here and now, inner peace, kindness, letting go, separation, stillness, trusting life, worry

Diary entry – a Tuesday

So much seemingly taking place and yet ‘I’ feel very little to do with it. It’s as if there is … More

anxiety, childhood damage, feeling safe, letting go, mindfulness, self compassion, suffering

Asking for Help

4 hours in the sunshine and birdsong at the allotment yesterday. Was good to do some physical work and have … More

Appreciation, asking for help, building resilience, childhood damage, feeling safe, inspiration, Recovery, resistance, suffering, wellbeing

Choosing to Let Life go Well

I was lying in bed this morning, no need to get up, no need to do anything other than enjoy … More

Appreciation, asking for help, being present, childhood damage, fear of success, flourishing, money fears, self compassion, self love, self soothing, thriving, trusting life, upper limit problem

Arising Stuff – Recapitulation

Long one today…more of a personal diary entry on the childhood recapitulation and letting go trail. They keep arriving – … More

childhood damage, fear, letting go, memories, old friends and family, self compassion, self defence, shame, worry

Loving Ourselves – a reframing

We don’t have to learn how to love ourselves. We already love ourselves. All we have to do is to … More

being present, building resilience, childhood damage, flourishing, living abundantly, mindfulness, mindulness, self care, self compassion, self love, self soothing, success

It’s not all Roses

I often find my mood dipping. It happens quickly. At times it’s when I get carried away in little hostile … More

anxiety, beauty of nature, being present, breathing, childhood damage, compassion, guilt, nature walks, Recovery, self care, self compassion, self defence, self love, self soothing, thoughts, wellbeing, worry

Having a Beginners Mind

I am experiencing a flow with my psychotherapy clients. I seem to know what to say and when and which … More

anxiety, childhood damage, fear of success, feeling safe, love, self care, self compassion, self love, self soothing

Letting the Joy loose

So. I’m still waiting to find out about the big project. And towards the end of yesterday I identified the … More

anxiety, being present, childhood damage, feeling safe, gratitude, self soothing

Uncomfortable realisation…

I’ve told the story many times about how my increasing self compassion and flourishing self worth caused me to let … More

childhood damage, friends, guilt, letting go, old friends and family, self care, self compassion

The Terror and the Wonder of being Alive

Bit of a longer one this morning as I sit here drinking tea waiting to leave in an hour to … More

acceptance, anxiety, asking for help, beauty of nature, being present, childhood damage, compassion, feeling safe, fight or flight reponse, Recovery, self care, self compassion, self soothing, thoughts, worry

You Get What you Feel you Deserve

And that doesn’t apply to being struck by a random childhood disease and the likes. I have noticed how challenging … More

business success, childhood damage, family conflict, fear of success, living abundantly, Money Issues, thriving, trusting life, upper limit problem

Reframing the Past

I have written a lot about the less than ideal aspects of my past and their effect on me. Looking … More

acceptance, Appreciation, childhood damage, family relationships on the spiritual path, feeling safe, gratitude, letting go, love, nature, self soothing

More sunshine and more anxiety

Just had a walk up the river with the dogs, yesterday it was through the bluebells in the woods with … More

business success, childhood damage, fear, painful times, worry

How to be Happy, even if it Scares you.

And this is one big note-to-self here. I feel fear just writing this post. I’m scared of being happy. There, … More

abundance, anxiety, asking for help, childhood damage, compassion, feeling safe, gratitude, Money Issues, Recovery, self abuse, self care, self compassion, self love, self sabotage, self soothing, success, trusting life, upper limit problem

Easing gently into Self Care

And how to integrate it into my life, and how I do it. Firstly I take note that there is … More

anxiety, being present, breathing, building resilience, childhood damage, compassion, feeling safe, here and now, kindness, mindfulness, present moment awareness, Recovery, resistance, self care, self defence, self love, self soothing, stillness, trusting life

On Mindfulness, the dangers…

I’ve observed at a drop in mindfulness group I used to go to that some severely anxious people who came … More

childhood damage, compassion, gratitude, ptsd, self care, self compassion, self soothing, stress, worry

Don’t like my Mum

Dear Friends, I was not a happy bunny yesterday. My mum who had sprained her ankle and suspected it might … More

anger, childhood damage, mother issues, old friends and family

Deserving Wellbeing

A fragment of thought after pondering the resistance I’ve experienced to making positive s subject is huge and requires a … More

asking for help, building resilience, childhood damage, feeling safe, self soothing

Mother issues

I went to dinner last night at my mums, and my cousin was there too. I was exhausted after a … More

anxiety, childhood damage, feeling safe, self care

On Success

Thought I’d write a list, a sort of check in to the positive things that are happening. I am experiencing … More

childhood damage, fear, gratitude, money, Recovery, self sabotage, self soothing, success

Leaning into Feelings

One of the best tools in my stress resilience and anxiety recovery toolbox is learning to accept my feelings as … More

anxiety, childhood damage, fear, self compassion, self love

Self Love Club Update

I attended last night and it was intense. The theme was self acceptance. She got us to write down some … More

childhood damage, guilt, Recovery, self care, self compassion, self love, shame

Self Encouragement

I feel a need to do this a lot recently, even though things are definitely improving. I want to remind … More

Appreciation, asking for help, business, childhood damage, gratitude, money, self soothing, success

Awoke feeling stress

How is that bloody possible after 2 chilled days and a great sleep?! not sure why at all. Woke up … More

childhood damage, fear, self compassion, stress, worry

Going easy on Expectations

Some of the least happy periods I’ve had in my life have been when I’ve expected too much of myself. … More

childhood damage, self compassion

Do we Get what we Feel we Deserve?

This is my experience of life so far. In the past when my level of self compassion and love was … More

childhood damage, self compassion, self love, self sabotage

Repairing the Inner Relationship

The other day I got news of the death of an old boyfriend who I met when I was 18. … More

childhood damage, self abuse, self love, self sabotage

How can I be Kind to Myself Today?

Every day is an exciting opportunity to start afresh with new practises of self compassion and of finding ways to … More

breathing, childhood damage, self abuse, self compassion, self love, thoughts

Self Love Vs Self Sabotage

These two are having a juicy war inside me at the moment. The more I love myself and open to allowing … More

abundance, childhood damage, self abuse, self compassion, self love, success, upper limit problem

My mind is having a big inner rant

It’s a family member, arggghhhhhh. Nothing like families to press your buttons. Who was it that said if you think … More

a course in miracles, being present, breathing, bullying, childhood damage, family conflict, feeling safe, mindfulness, open awareness, thoughts, toxic families
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