‘Your mind is steeped in the habits of evaluation and acquisition and will not admit that the incomparable and unobtainable…
Sunshine
It’s a strange type of mismatch when I’m feeling this low and the much anticipated sun is shining so warmly…
Blues Coloured Glasses
I have had blues coloured glasses on for some time here and I notice the whole of life has had…
Unhappy Start
‘He who speaks doesn’t not know. He who know does not speak.’ Yes that’s me right now and it’s another…
Long One
Been quite some time since I felt fully well and not in any physical pain, and with abundant enough energy…
Pepped Up a Bit
Spring in the air. Long waking hours from 4am which are well appreciated and used for deep meditation and relaxing…
Bit Jangled
And mostly by my own thoughts. It’s Bank holiday quiet out there, and a light rain falls. Odd atmosphere today.…
The Wilds
Some wrangling going on in my head this morning. Once it gets hold of a perceived conflict….it does a number…
More Quiet
Another session with William Howells brought more love reminders and much appreciated reassurance. The ego keeps tightening up in the…
Lot Happening
Free falling into each moment whether it’s noticed as that or not. Walking along the lane in the morning sun…
Let’s Shine
Beautiful warm air today and greenery appearing all around us, spring is fully here. Relatively at peace and calm at…
Quiet
Well what now. Quiet, warmth, and note to little self – safety. Nervous system relatively calm. Inner body there’s a…
Stress n strain
Hard to find anything actually true to say today. Facing and experiencing into what is actually happening right now and…
Crashed Yesterday
A new week and just back from a walk round the block. Practising conscious breathing and walking and noticed that…
Here and Now
Here and now is Hunky-dory. I have been more conscientiously applying mindfulness. Being present. Belly Breathing. Listened to Garab Dorje…
Letting Go
Some change in the air. Started a more formal meditation practise this morning using a Jon Kabat-Zinn guided 20 minute…
Remembering I am Consciousness
Had a wonderful session with William H yesterday, where he gave me some beautiful heart pointers. Like where and how…
Awakening of Teijitsu
“There was nothing more than this… No ground… Nothing to lean on stronger than the cane she held. Nothing to…
Asked for Help
Lot of challenging situations all at once. Critical mass. Nothing life threatening but enough complexity and sense of emotional overwhelm…
William Howells Wise Quote
We rarely are Silent long enough to allow our suffering to dissolve. We avoid. We distract. We wallow. Stillness of…
Worried about T
Miserable again, a good bit of yesterday and in the night when I awoke at 3am. The walk with T…
Wise Quote – William Howells
“When We get lost in mind’s activity- -We take focus away from Our own Heart. Mind’s busyness obscures the Silence…
Up Early
‘We either make ourselves happy or we make ourselves miserable, the amount of work is the same.’ Don Juan Matus…
Being with Irritation
I observe the noise of the stomping on the floorboards above from the ceiling and the resistance response of the…
Jed McKenna Quote
‘In accepting this lunch engagement, my hope was that I could slip back into my old persona enough to manage…
Vigilance and Love
Been labouring mood wise much of yesterday and last night waking up ill at ease. On a knife edge of…
Wise Quote by William Howells
‘We are the Deathless Void- -imagining that we are individuals- -who fear “dying” into the Void. Relax. “We” are momentary…
No better moment
There’s no next better moment, the ego laments on its deathbed. I’m standing in front of a large cherry tree…
Beautiful Morning
Big temptations to fear all around and I’m not so often accepting the invitations. Close enough to see them though.…
Into a Pit
Pit of hell last night, the whole mood was so very low. I was awake disturbed and mulling compulsively over…
Remembering
A couple of dreams threw me off balance last night after an amazing deep and peaceful sleep. One was a…
Being with Blossom
Having a few anxiety surges this morning. Been listening to a talk about the predictive processing mechanism of the mind…
Back to the Present
Where have thou been? In my imagination a lot of the time, that’s where. Lost in the mind’s prediction mechanism,…
Surfacing
Feel as though I’m just coming back to my senses in the last 24 hours. This is entirely welcome and…
Nothing Much
Days and weeks drift past, and it’s another weekend. It’s all been pretty heavy, sometimes it seems like we are…
Small Steps
I feel okay this morning despite some heaviness around yesterday’s events. Back still pretty sore, I’ve got a heat strap…
Back Lanes
Just back from a walk around the block with the dog up the lanes at the back of the apartment.…
Jaggy Mat
Lay on the new jaggy shakti mat this morning after the shower. Very painful indeed! I managed about one minute,…
Going wondering
Just wandering around, doddling, skiddling, paddling, exploring, being outside and sitting hanging out, allowing curiosity to overcome any inertia…yesterday an…
A Call
Watched the second half of Wim Wender’s film ‘Perfect Days’ early this morning in bed and it was such a…
Still Windy
Which suits a sense of disquiet I feel. A lot of anxiety in bed this morning on and off from…
Anger
Sort of a day off yesterday, just one therapy client and some supplier admin tasks. Client got angry with me.…
Testing
Sounds like a big moan here but I’m not really complaining. Very busy with me and my story right now,…
Resistance and Feeling safe
Of course I’m going to be feeling unease when I am not being authentic, I’m so rarely truly myself. When…
Ego Watching
Aware of the part that wants to remain an ego, that really doesn’t want to give up being an ego.…
Rainy again
Today I’ve found it harder to stabilise inside the peace. It’s there, and I can reach in and feel it,…
Softening
Reborn every day, and today it’s pretty noticeable. All feeling unfamiliar and uniquely itself, a slightly different set of variables…
Reassuring Pause
Kind of a lost feeling this morning, though not in a negative way strangely. Disoriented to find myself in the…
Appreciation
Much reduced fear level again this morning. How interesting. I wonder what happened to turn things around. Maybe just the…
Brighter
Woken feeling lighter than recently for some reason unknown, though it’s bright and sunny out there which is nice. The…
Wise Lao Tzu Quote
“Live a quiet and simple life, free of ideas and concepts. Find contentment in the practice of undiscriminating virtue, the…
A March Thursday
Yesterday was simple and fine, there were 2 therapy clients, the second a walk and talk session in the beautiful…
Mood
A mood like this is okay. Bearable, it’s just what it is…it’s not awful it’s just not happy and jolly.…
Quiet Time
In such a flat semi-miserable state much of the time just now. Maybe just time to accept and make friends…
New Week
Yesterday trundled along quite smoothly with a couple of appointments in different areas of the city. Driving in the sunshine,…
Constant Changes
Yet every week is quite samey too. Dog gets walked, clients seen, chat to son, eat, see the men. People…
Endings
It’s the end of even more. Some things are just over. Goals and aspirations…can’t even think of any now it’s…
Moan
About to say all this in error and going to say it all anyway. Problem laden reflecting is a clue…
Release of Tension
It’s been a different feel having the scaffolding holding up a hiding part collapse. It took effort. Now a physically…
Well, Wow to William
The tension and anxiety has eased hugely after speaking to William yesterday and it’s a whole different energetic space this…
Learning to Rest with it All 