Lot of fun yesterday, first with a client with whom a very direct, humorous and trusting relationship has developed. And he is facing himself so honestly, it’s beautiful. We had a good laugh as I tried to convince his defence system that loving himself is perfectly safe. That is wouldn’t lead to him becoming vain or conceited. A common fear that people voice. It was really pretty fun.
Then met up with my friend R for a rainy walk and then coffee and cake. Much excellent serious spiritual and psychological depth, often into new territory with her, and also much laughter. She questions and challenges me at times too which I like. I voiced and acknowledged that I appreciate that mix of depth and laughing I experience with her.it’s not often I laugh out loud.
Then to a construction business meeting with the next client, who made some final adjustments to the plan which R drew up for me later. New plan now sent off to be laminated for the men. That meeting went very well, and we seem to get on which bodes well for the upcoming quite long project of 12 weeks. Starting it on Monday, meeting M and S there later today to go over it all.
Today I’m going to meet P for a dog walk and coffee and then going over to the current job to see the men. To see how the project is going and in preparation for meeting that client tomorrow morning to choose plants at the big nursery.
I gave them a pay rise yesterday of £1 an hour, £2k a year, to help with the inflation and cost of living situation. I was putting it off till I felt we were in a more secure financial position as a business, but since life, the world situation and business all seems to be pretty insecure, might as well go for it and have us all a bit happier and more appreciated.
It was a good 8 hour sleep last night. This morning in bed I voiced my self appreciation. “I’m here for you, I love you, I appreciate you, I care for you” I say to myself. It is becoming easy, a new automatic way of being now. And a welcome warm feeling of love accompanies it. This restoration of the truth.
We are lovable whether we acknowledge it or not. Time to get onboard with this truth.
I’ve been triggered by upstairs noise again these last few days. Think the mum has returned after being away for a few months and now the noise has restarted above me at regular intervals. I had got so used to the quiet as the new normal.
Pressing my buttons experience happening and I get to see that part of me that tries to assert ‘This shouldn’t be happening’. ‘They shouldn’t be doing that’. And the disturbance inside from that level of attempting to resist what is actually happening.
I’m in a body on a planet hurtling at great speed through space and that helps give some sensible perspective of the little drama I’m creating for myself getting annoyed by such a passing trivial happening.
So yesterday I put on Michael Singer again. That same bit I always use when I need to start over again. He coaches me through it. Feel the disturbance inside, be with it, don’t try and avoid it, allow it fully, give up your right to it. Which you don’t have anyway. Surrender. And surrender. And keep on surrendering. Let go. Give it up.
Opportunity after a opportunity this life provides.