Yesterday a new pine woodland to explore beyond the city. The vibration of driving calmed the nervous system, new sights, … More
Category: surrender experiment
Learning to Rest in Awareness
Being awake in bed and just being for a while. Not doing anything. Not picking up the iPad. No rush … More
More Calmness
Such a treat to go through these last days nearly entirely anxiety free and to experience being this free from … More
Not Two
The feeling residue of the ‘tantric sex’ dream was with me almost all day yesterday. That phrase tantric sex actually … More
Really really Free
Yesterday – was such a joy of a day. There was a therapy client first thing on Zoom. Every session … More
Navigating Feelings and Thoughts
Windy wet start out there this morning. Dog curled up happy beside me. Nearly always open and happy she is, … More
Not Scared
‘The Force’ is playing a game of brinkmanship it seems, it’s really ‘me’ though – maybe I’m testing resilience against … More
Enlightenment, what is it?
Another ordinary day with its guest star ⭐️ beauty ⭐️ present much of the time yesterday. Went to the park … More
Evening Thanks
Breath in……and out….saying thank you inside as I exhale. Breath in…and out…..thank you. A pause to be grateful. Thank you … More
Sitting into Trust
Awoke slowly and the words of the Gayatri arose again. I am in good company! And I fell asleep last … More
Allowing Well-being
Sun shining on the trees out the windows this morning, and all is well. Allowing well-being to shine too, and … More
Gayatri Mantra
Still reciting the Gayatri out loud quietly and inside a lot. I haven’t much experience with mantra based meditation but … More
Dark Night Cont…
What a drama it all is right now. Still in this trial of a time, and this fear is in … More
Appreciating the Small
Awake at 5, I open the window and the fragrant rainy fresh air rushes in, and my body says thank … More
Gratitude Balm
Further in I go, a feeling of falling and of desolation of hope – no less 😂 oh I do … More
New Vibe in the Air
Out early today to bathe in the morning sunshine – up the river to the woods and into the field. … More
Being Open and Feeling Low
Being somewhat unravelled, undone and deconstructed just now, I’m not shining my usual note. There’s a low mood visiting and … More
Procrastination Part 2 and Resistance to Happiness
Coming here and writing was a big help yesterday. It is often helpful for clarifying and clearing the mind, and … More
Dissolving Identity
Everything I ever wanted is already here. I was just watching this video by Angelo DiLullo in bed this morning … More
Testing back into Unchanging Stillness
I have two clients to see this morning. It is always a great way to start the day, being useful. … More
Aloneness
I just read an excellent article summing up why reading the news is bad for us. It really spoke to … More
Resting and Adjusting
Was able to articulate a little better what is being experienced when I was with M. Something about his energy … More
Self Doubt, Self Confidence
No headache today and it’s my birthday. Woohoo. Got dinner tonight with 2 friends at their place. Did the usual … More
Defending a Position
Day 4 of this headache! and feeling quite worn down and mostly want to lie down a lot. It has … More
Low Mood Morning
The colourful visual zigzags started yesterday signalling the start of a migraine and then it arrived. Mildly painful only but … More
Facing the Disturbing Stuff
Thought it’s about time I just allow the noises from upstairs to take place without putting music on every time … More
Just this Moment
The hum of the heating, the warmth on the skin, the weight of the body on the seat. I’m breathing … More
Airy Fairyland
Quite enjoyed the MRI scan, even all the loud strange sounds. An hour of imposed meditation. And to be in … More
Peace of the Present
Experiencing a noticeable lack of awareness of ‘me’ recently. Or at least the thoughts aren’t so strongly self referential. I … More
Waking up in Heaven
Awaking early I become aware of the exquisite pleasure of the body within folds of fresh brushed cotton bedding. The … More
Learning to Rest with it All 