In the Slow Lane

It’s been an almighty adjustment slowing down. I’m listening to what my body wants now, after so many years of busy busy busying around all day long. Could. Not. Go. On.

And now my behaviour is less ‘grabby’ towards life’s short term pleasures and stimulations. Lowered expectations of titillation and now contented with less.

It’s perhaps something that happens with age and after so much excitement, thrills and adventure seeking. Now it’s stability that’s important.

And even though very little seems to be happening, interesting unexpected things seem to happen. An old friend appearing after nearly 20 years and is camping up with me for a few weeks here in the house. I have a monthly invite to dine with a few ex fellow therapy students. That’s been a lot of fun. And exceedingly open sharing going on, love it.

Went to Lisbon for a couple of days to see my 26 year old son. That was, well, so lovely to see him but pretty painful all in all. Didn’t like the place, the food, the weather or hearing in eloquent detail how I’d fucked up as a mother with dire results for him. I cried and it all cost about £750 for 2 days! So no more travel for me for a good while.

That was not the slow life.

Life in the slow lane is more about

• Watching the autumn leaves float down the river
• Easy going walks through the trees
• Going to bed early and getting up when it feels right
• Lying on the sofa reading as and when
• Only working when I feel like it
• Not arranging more than one major thing to do a day
• Eating little and quality food
• Not drinking alcohol
• Quality deep chats
• Cuddling with the dog
• Having a candle on all day on the kitchen table
• Going to an art exhibition
• Noticing thoughts and letting go immediately of worry ones
• Avoiding rush hour traffic
• Driving slowly
• Giving people time and space to speak, and talking less

That sort of thing. Time. Enjoying it. There’s lots of it. And lots to notice and quietly savour, there’s no more rush. ‘Nothing to do, nowhere to go’ as the zen monks say.