Life has been busy and relaxed recently, not much drama. I have been settling into an ongoing stability inside that has come from allowing and simply noticing the thoughts and feelings as they travel through, without following them and making them into a story or avoiding them either. To let go of the wish to control and let it all happen as it wants to happen, and know it will be perfect. Life challenges this regularly, and I forget and sometimes take offence or get afraid, or over excited and talk shit – I lose my balance and then remember it.
I noticed recently that the highs that come with good fortune present another type of temptation to lose balance from the ones I am more used to focusing on – the lows and scary thoughts. Business is brisk at the moment, we are in demand and I am experiencing some lovely success. Debts are being paid and I am freeing myself of that burden. I have been so used to struggle, that it’s almost been like coming off a drug. And I am watching all the little mechanisms in place which pop up regularly and could undermine the allowing of the flow of abundance in all its expression. It’s the unknown in many ways. I see how people can get stuck in what they are used to, if they are not aware of the mechanisms inside that keep them ‘safe’ on familiar ground, even if its uncomfortable. I am going with this for the ride and the learning and the fun of new territory. Even writing about it is triggering some abundance curtailing tendencies here.
I’m going to Croatia in just over a week with my son for 7 days. New territory theme again! Time to unplug from work for a relatively long while for me. I notice fear arising about this. Hello fear 🙂 Its okay fear, you can come.
I notice that this new ‘just flowing’ with everything has allowed a lot of space to fit everything in. Life is incredibly busy and yet I experience spaciousness almost all the time.