Leaning Back and Trusting

Started the day in bed early with some Adyashanti, an inspiring and supportive little talk and feel full up.

Time to live it. Moment to moment. Present to the flow of experiences as they arise. Noticing. Just noticing. Allowing. Even though I feel anxious I love and trust myself fully.

And to be in the direct experience of what is actually happening right now, and not to be dominated by the contents of my imagination and the thoughts. Which always seem to want to find trouble and problems. These thoughts can be so seductive and tempting….but when I give in to them, I’m lost in stories temporarily in my head, stories that try and predict outcomes.

Right now – it’s a warm comfortable place to sit and write, tea to drink. There is an impasse taking place, there’s uncertainty and I am in that too. I notice a dislike of that. Prefer certainty. Control. There’s anxiety present.

Do I aim for just a full trusting – ‘it’s okay everything will work out’ attitude? Yes I think so, let me keep going with that.

Drop and trust

Drop and trust

Drop and trust

Just renewed the business insurance for this year. I did it monthly payments to give the option of departing from the business.

There’s an almighty noise coming from outside again, chainsaws. Noticing a strong contracting away dislike response. Settling back inside, letting the disturbing feelings be there. Leaning back. Allowing. Not making a story.

Going out shortly anyway to meet a friend in the park. Guys all paid. visiting the uncle this afternoon.

I watch these cows for ages yesterday afternoon. Savouring in their calmness and beauty with a tourist from England who appeared. We had an intimate communication full of love and openness. Beautiful.

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