A good day surprisingly after that news. Yes I have some fear.
Life goes on…other stuff doesn’t seem to become less real or enjoyable or valued. I feel present for it all.
Was at my mums to return her glasses in the morning which I took by mistake last night and had a long session of talking it all through with her. I’d been keeping it all in to save her the worry. She offered to help me out. How kind. Always so generous. Then came back and saw the cleaners and ended our relationship for now. Very amicably.
Then N’s wife M texted for a walk in the park and off I went for three whole hours. Warm and sunny all day. I wasn’t really feeling that I’d be good company in my state of angst, but we had a great time.
She is very good company, deep, on the path and understands the deeper messages of life events. As we spoke through it all a text arrives from a new counselling client…confirmation. I know, I know…..we both laughed at the positive omen. We met so many lovely positive people and I showed her those rare plants too. Dogs were happy getting about with us for so long.
There’s 2 main challenges in the life of form right now.
1. I’d like to cease trading the construction side without going bankrupt, and I owe money to both suppliers and hmrc and M in holiday pay. I want to pay that off and not leave debt.
2. Increasing counselling clients so that I can make a living from doing that and maybe some design work.
I put it out to the universe as a sincere request to make those happen. I ask for help to make this transition in a way that doesn’t harm others. I accept any difficulties for me, and am willing to move into my correct position. If that means carrying on for the summer and paying off the debts I’m okay with that too. I’d prefer that, a calm dignified transition. I’m willing to use the situation to develop greater wisdom.
I know what my calling is, what feels aligned with what the world needs more of and I can fulfil that function if I have more bandwidth to do it. I need help to make this happen. Thank you for all this abundance. The lessons, the rawness of life on the cliff edge.
Learning to Rest with it All 