Happy February!

All happening again this morning. 2 therapy clients followed by a possible new construction client right after. Husband has a terminal illness and she wants their beloved garden nice for his final months ❤️

Nerves have settled down big time. Had a good session with a long term therapy client and then I drove to Edinburgh yesterday listening to Eckhart Tolle, bathing in material I was unable to access when I let my ego get a hold of me last week and terrify me out of my senses.

I ended up taking a wrong turn on the motorway and added an hour to the journey and back through stunning unknown countryside and hills through beautiful old stone villages. I could live here I thought. Meeting with Edinburgh client went well, mostly about advaita and consciousness! And the garden too. There was a moment of intense intimacy as we acknowledged that we are each other, no separation. Saw the men. Received the first payment from her, all of which I will have to pay to hmrc today or tomorrow for last quarter’s vat bill. Got the plan ordered and delivered for the next big job, waiting for the 3ds before a meeting with them this week. Also got the next projects survey delivered.

Then met E in the park in the rain and had lunch then a walk. I noticed he was contradicting me a lot, as he did last week too. Almost everything he said was a correction. I wonder what that’s about. Being a peace lover I go along and I notice. I will confront it though, find a humorous way. He’s always been a bit of a mystery even though we have met every single week since 2017.

I seem to have an issue with other people. I am note sure what that’s about. Conflict is often close by and certainly inside I find that increasingly most company doesn’t work for me. Yet I love to have company, or the personality does anyway.

There is no outside though, and there are no others. No shrinking away from anything. That’s the lesson. There are no wrong moves. This path I’m on…..I can see why the monks and nuns go away into the mountain monasteries to really focus.

I feel as though I’ve woken up to discover that an ideology has swept the land that I didn’t notice and now everyone is calling triangles circles, mandated by law and a hate crime if you don’t go along. It’s state sponsored lying. men can’t ever become women. And I don’t agree that men should legally be allowed call themselves women, change the sex on their birth certificate, can just self declare and get access to women only spaces including and sports. Nor children taught in school about all this. The consequences are huge. How on earth did this happen. Am I missing something? Let’s ask the iChing.

‘Success comes when you pull your nature forward without pushing yourself into the world.

The geese, in their grace and dignity, symbolize this rising and a connection between our organic and spiritual nature. They walk on land, float in water and soar through the sky, revealing how following instinct and relying on surrounding elements to uplift us, we always arrive exactly where we need to be. There is no need to force your will on events.’

There it is. Getting caught up with the details out there is not my true path. Engaging in conflicting with what is going on in the world is a distraction my ego enjoys. I’m right, they are wrong. Taking a position, defending a position. No no.