I think was resisting it, and trying to get a control thing going. My mind was saying You’re just not organised! in a critical way.
I remembered to turn towards the disturbed energy and a sense of acceptance emerged. I relaxed with it. Or relaxed back inside amidst it.
When fear is present it is difficult to go with the flow. To hear the inner promptings that just know what to do and how to be. Fear scrambles the signal and the inner radio receiver that we have can’t hear the message.
So I sent some loving kindness to that part, the Worrying Wendy, the inner child parts that was having a fear wobble, and just communicated I see you, I am here for you, you are allowed to be here, you are safe and you are not alone.
I also cancelled some appointments yesterday and gave myself the whole afternoon off to give space and time to just be. I was working lightly away too, interacting with a design client about her garden sculpture choice. then to bed early and nearly an 8 hour sleep. And I feel ready for today, there’s 4 people to see in my diary.
I can feel the magic in the air again, the subtle senses are back online now that the anxiety has subsided. It’s automatic. We don’t have to change ourselves, only identify and let go of the blockages. The rest works automatically. Relax the tightening up tendency. Learn to soothe ourselves, talk to the scared parts, the disowned parts. Which for me requires spaces between activities and obligations to just be free flowing.