Day 9

A good sleep. Less and less coughing now. Still no taste or smell. I just did a test and I am still positive. Still taking ivermectin and various vitamins, and quercetin, drinking lots of water.

Going to see my first client in a week on Zoom this morning. He was the last one I saw when I was just starting to feel properly unwell last week.

I was thinking of having the dog back and trying to get back into the swing of things. Not sure about going for walks, am I able to yet? Strength wise.

I have lived in here for a whole week now and not seen a single other person, and I’ve enjoyed it. I’ve savoured these days free of all responsibility. Been great to have phone calls and texts though from family and friends.

There’s nothing that is holding my interest to read or watch much. No philosophical or spiritual texts or talks. Nothing on the news or Twitter or Facebook, nothing, zilch. What does this mean? I hope it’s contributed to the paring away of the extraneous distractions I can so belittle myself with. This precious attention of ours.

This week I’ve learned to have less fear of just being. I didn’t have a choice and got used to just sitting being without distractions.

Also I have no work lined up and have not been afraid of that, not able to give it much attention.

So interesting how fear has a grip. And yet it disappears the moment we walk though it. This seems to be the crux of the lesson. To throw oneself into the arms of life, to surrender completely to it, trust it. The opposite of contracting away. and yet we learned to contract away, and how deeply that went in. The view for much of the week.

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