It is definitely a feeling that arises from within for me. I’m pretty sure it’s there all the time, joy and wonder and delight at the smallest thing. I conclude that as it ‘happens’ when I’ve cleared away what’s in front of it, usually the domineering and strangling effect that anxiety brings.
When I turn to a passing anxiety and I fully give it my attention and allow it. I give it SPACE TO BE THERE. I be with the discomfort. Like right now. I ask where do I feel it in my body. Ah there it is, felt sensation around my throat, a little tight, swirly maybe and upper chest. I stay here with it.
I introduce a little lighthearted even humorous ‘hi there Anxiety’ I see you, it’s okay’. I make up a silly song to a silly tune with improvised words. It then usually subsides. Like now and 90% every time I turn towards it and allow a little space around it inside.
Happiness doesn’t really come from the outside experiences, though they can give a temporarily lift in mood. An enjoyable lunch with a friend, a chat….seeing the beauty of the trees and the sun on the river. Having some money come in to pay some bills. Maybe a new jacket or boots. Loving and being loved by the dog. A play with the dog. A good read. A laugh with the guys. A happy customer. A comfy bed. Feeling safe for a while. Connecting with my son. Helping therapy clients see they aren’t deficient after all. All of these contribute to a joyful virtuous cycle of optimism and positive thoughts.
Life is whizzing past. I do not want to be propelled forward by fear and hope/desire, and fulfilling my wants and likes and dislikes.
I am busy creating the ideal conditions for that innate happiness to arise and come out and express itself. And that is what facing fear head on does in my experience. And along with that gratitude and love arises with it, and all the other good juju qualities, also natural to our authentic selves.
