After some months of very little going on this week has been a big beautiful storm of people and activity starting with my son arriving back from Berlin for 2 days. And a trip to see salmon jumping up a waterfall as they return upstream to their birthplace to spawn (see video). A fun dinner party and several overnight guests. Oh and a 4 day headache. The sacking of a new employee, badly late on his first week, not on. The go ahead for 2 projects, both 8 and 10 weeks long so we are booked up to the end of May. Longest ever period of financial security for me. A long walk with 2 good friends in the rain through the colourful autumn woods yesterday.
And there’s covid-19 amidst all of this, playing with us all. The press having a bonanza at our expense and the governments not sure what to do, and sowing chaos. The experts are all over the place about it. Who to trust when nobody really knows.
Such useful raw material. I go in and out of fear. That pull is hard to resist, especially as the world is in one big amygdala hijack it seems. Resist I must though.
My inside peace is very valuable to me. I make better decisions from that place. My love can come out more easily. There’s a few pockets of sanity out there resisting the fear, valuable reference points. I have a sense the mitigation efforts are a big over reaction and in years to come we will look back at the damage caused and shake our heads. Or even further ahead in the future will we look back and see that it was just the shock we needed?
Meantime, this relatively solitary existence continues, much as it did before covid. Time for inner work and nurturing habits that sustain and open me.
The revolution starts inside. For me it’s being present and turning up to each moment as it unfolds. Face the fear of not interpreting and stay with the experience.