Not that I would share this with anyone I work with or for, it is our secret! They would feel unnerved to say the least to discover that I use The Force to make decisions all day long. I have discovered that in the absence of fear there is a ‘right time’ for everything to happen. That doesn’t mean that there is a wrong time exactly, but there is a sweet spot, a moment when ‘permission’ is opened up fully to proceed and the universe conspires to support you.
I use the word the Force slightly humorously, what I really mean is the Tao. I suppose some people call it their spirit guides or angels. I prefer to stay away from anything religious or new agey or anything that requires me to have a belief in something. I have spent years rooting out and letting go of beliefs. I need my feet on the ground and my own experience to go by.
I often feared what would happen if I became so relaxed that I was no longer afraid. Afraid of making mistakes, afraid of not having enough money or time, afraid of clients getting angry with me, afraid HMRC would investigate me, afraid of not looking competent to the staff or to clients. All these fears kept me in a driven state, making sure nothing bad happened. So there was an underlying anxiety always present as I tried to remain vigilant.
Of course lots of these things did actually happen, and looking back I wonder if fear actually contributed to some of it, by preventing me from listening to the guidance from my heart and from the Tao (which are one and the same thing of course).
Now I am playing with this guidance, experimenting to see what happens if I actually do listen to it instead of allowing anxiety to motivate me. There may be a drawing due, or an email to write, or a price to calculate, and I hold off until the right moment for all of it. And the sky has not fallen in. Not once. In fact everything is working more smoothly than ever before. Not only that, my staff and my staff are happier, more relaxed and the gardens are built with very few delays of mistakes. Also sometimes the time to act is right now with no hesitation. It is not all waiting till the last moment, its often an immediate action.
Here is an example. Yesterday for the first time in a while I was thinking about what I wanted to happen with the business and my life next. I want the business to carry on as it is and have more space for travel for myself. My son and I are talking about 2 weeks in Cambodia but at the moment I can’t really make that happen yet because there are so many things that only I can do in the business. I realised that I would require another ‘me’ on board that can take over my role as required to free me up. Then yesterday I got an email from a guy with a Masters in Landscape Architecture, loads of experience on the ground and I acted immediately and he is coming over today to come around with me to see our work. Voila!
Maybe I was mistaken. I have humility about my ability to follow the Tao. I can be mistaken. My motive can sometimes have a sneaky fear under it that I don’t see until after I have acted. I am not completely free of fear, or attachment, or greed or grasping. Every motive needs to be examined. Let’s see what happens today with him.
“Simplicity, patience, compassion.
These three are your greatest treasures.
Simple in actions and thoughts, you return to the source of being.
Patient with both friends and enemies,
you accord with the way things are.
Compassionate toward yourself,
you reconcile all beings in the world.”
Lao Tzu-Tao Te Ching
Learning to Rest with it All 